Memories
by Bionic mermaid
Summary: When one of the kids gains a new ability, secrets from the past make an unexpected reappearance.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is an idea that came to me a little while ago and it's so different to what I'm used to writing that I sort of dismissed it but it wouldn't leave me so here it is, on a new account so I won't startle my followers. It's rated T for now, but be aware that this story will probably deal with some difficult themes later on. I'll mark those chapters when and if they come up. One last thing as this is becoming quite a long author's note: If you like it (or even if you don't, I'm always looking to improve my writing) and want me to continue with this story, please leave a review, it really means a lot to me. Thank you! So without further ado, here's the first chapter of _Memories!  
_** **Disclaimer: I do not own Lab Rats or any of its characters**

 _Shadows climb up the dark walls, pressing closer and closer. A tall figure lurks in the distance. Everything is dark, blurred, shaking. The figure slides through the shadows, closer, closer. Somewhere, a child is crying. Please don't find me, please don't find me. Quiet sobs, soft gasps. The figure looms high above, a menacing smile breaks through the darkness._

" _Ready or not, here I come."_

* * *

I awake to find myself pressed firmly against the back of my capsule, heart racing and feeling uncomfortably warm. Panicking, I throw open the door and collapse out into the cool lab. As the fresh air brushes against my skin and the crushing weight of feeling trapped lifts, I relax. I head off to the bathroom to wash my face of its sticky sheen and as I watch the water swirl down the drain, the lingering traces of my dream drift away into the pale morning.

* * *

Breakfast, as usual, is a quietly busy affair. Adam and Leo race to finish their cereal first while Chase sits quietly and plans his day. Mr Davenport is hardly awake and Tasha's busy enough cleaning up the spilt milk that I'm able to slip in and grab a piece of toast and some coffee without anybody really noticing. I don't usually drink coffee, but I've barely slept all week and we have intensive training today.

"Good morning" I mumble as I sit down opposite Chase, rubbing my neck slightly.

"Morning," he replies, noticing my odd choice of breakfast but thankfully choosing not to say anything about it. "What's wrong with your neck?"

"Oh. Um, I don't know. I guess I just slept weird last night."

"You sleep standing up. Besides, you were fidgeting all last night. It was really annoying."

I just shrug lightly. "Maybe gym yesterday, then. I don't know."

Chase still doesn't look convinced, but at that moment the cereal race which had been proceeding uncharacteristically quietly beside us draws to a close and Adam announces himself the winner. I throw back the rest of my coffee, in the process reminding myself why I usually avoid it, and stand up from the table.

"Don't worry, Leo. You'll get him someday."

* * *

Training is not going well. Adam's frustrated, Chase is distracted, and I'm jittery from the lethal combination of sleep deprivation and caffeine. I had just run straight into Adam for the fifteenth time when Mr Davenport shut off the simulator.

"What is wrong with you three today? Adam, you need to break that door open faster, Bree, you know how to dodge things when you're super speeding so why aren't you? And Chase, you didn't really do anything wrong but that's mostly because you didn't do anything at all. You're supposed to be coordinating your abilities so you can be more efficient on missions but today it's like you don't even know each other." He sighs as we all look away, ashamed. "Look, you guys are a team. You're a great team and you do good things. But you need to look out for each other, okay?"

 _A little girl, holding back tears, sits on the ground as an even smaller boy hugs her and an older boy shouts at someone just out of view._

"Bree? Is everything okay?"

"Hm? Yeah, everything's fine. Sorry, just spaced out for a second."

 _I'm the little girl. The two boys, my brothers. Looking out for me._

"Um, Mr Davenport? I –"

All of a sudden my head explodes.

 _A baby girl, barely a few hours into the world. A tall figure, angrily shouting. "This isn't what I wanted! Look at it, it's useless. She's useless." The baby girl screams. She's hungry, but nobody feeds her. She's hurting, but nobody knows._

 _A baby girl, learning to walk, learning to talk. A tall figure, high above her, yanking up on her arms, shouting in her face. "Why do I bother with you? What's the point, you'll never be what I need." The baby girl sobs. She's tired, she's hurting, she's scared._

 _A little girl, just two years old. A tall figure, back turned to her. "See, look at this. He's smart, he doesn't cry, he's perfect. Why do we still need her?" The little girl cries silently. She's lonely, but nobody's here. She's hurting, but nobody cares._

 _A little girl, a few years old. A tall figure, looming above her. "Maybe you're not so useless after all. Come on, this won't hurt, don't be scared." The little girl blinks back tears. He's lying, she's hurting, she might never trust again._

The images race through my mind. The little girl is me. I'm remembering things, everything. I'm remembering my whole life. I don't want to remember. I want it to stop. It hurts, it's too loud, my mind is filled with screaming, with pain, with fear. I feel strong arms wrap around me and I can't breathe. I'm trapped, I can't get free, I can't even move. The figure from my dream circles the memories, closer, closer, and taller and darker until suddenly it descends upon me and I'm cloaked in darkness.

* * *

***Mr Davenport's POV***

Something strange is going on with Bree. She's been distant all morning, despite having swiped my coffee when she thought I wasn't paying attention. She claimed everything was fine, but then something clicked and she was completely gone.

"Bree?"

Her face is deathly pale and her eyes wide open in terror. She's hyperventilating, chest heaving as she desperately tries to suck in enough air.

"Bree!"

She's looking everywhere at once and nowhere at all, eyes darting frantically as she watches something nobody else can see. Suddenly, she goes completely limp, falling backwards into Adam's arms before closing her eyes, motionless.

Just then, Leo enters the lab. "Hey guys, Mom said lunch will be – what the heck is going on in here?"

Nobody answers him. All eyes turn to Chase as he checks Bree's pulse.

"She's fine, just unconscious," he concludes. "What just happened?"

"I honestly have no idea. I've never seen anything like that before." I check her chip data on the cyber desk. "She's unlocked a new bionic ability… eidetic memory. Huh, that's unusual."

Chase nods in understanding while Adam and Leo just look more confused.

"That means that she'll be able to vividly remember everything she's ever experienced, birth to present. And everything that happens to her in the future, she'll remember forever. I suggest you don't borrow money from her."

"And it's unusual," Chase adds, "because it's a sub-ability of super intelligence. How exactly did that happen, Mr Davenport?"

"Well, I'm not entirely sure about that, actually. My best guess is that when you guys combined your abilities to fight Krane, there must have been some overlap."

Chase seems satisfied with this answer, or at least isn't going to press the issue right now, but Adam looks from me to Bree in confusion.

"So if she's just unlocked an ability, why did she collapse? That's never happened to any of us before."

"Well, since your bionics weren't designed to use with the human nervous system, there are some incompatibilities – that's why you glitch. So what happened to Bree is like a glitch of sorts. Her human brain doesn't have the capacity to process so much information at once, so she shut down in order to sort through it. Does that make sense?"

Once again, Adam stared at me blankly.

Chase sighed. "Lots of stuff to remember. Brain too small" he simplified. "Good thing it wasn't you or else you might have exploded. Wait, Mr Davenport, what do you mean our bionics weren't designed for humans?"

I sigh, figuring that now is as good a time as any to tell them about their past. "Take a seat. There's something important that you need to know about."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I'm really sorry this has taken me over two weeks to update, I'm in the midst of finals at uni and finding time to write is really difficult at the moment. On the plus side though, my last exam is next Tuesday so after that expect a lot more updates! I'm thinking about making this account more active, since this is a fandom I'm pretty involved with, so let me know what you think!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Lab Rats or any of its characters.**

***Adam's POV***

"Take a seat. There's something important that you need to know about."

I quickly glance over at Chase, but he looks just as confused as I feel. I'd never admit it, but this frightens me a little. Chase is the smartest person in the world, so if he doesn't know what's going on, it must be a really big secret. I never liked secrets.

"Um, shouldn't we wait for Bree to wake up? She's probably going to want to hear this" I ask, not really knowing what else to do.

"Adam, I think she already knows," replies Leo. "Eidetic memory, remember?"

Right. Somehow, amongst all this confusion, I forgot about Bree's new ability. Everything seems to be happening all at once and it's making me lose track of my thoughts. Come to think of it, this must be how Bree feels – confused, overwhelmed, scared. I get the feeling that my life is about to be changed forever and it fills me with a growing sense of dread. I like things the way they are, they way they've always been.

Mr Davenport clears his throat, drawing us all out of our thoughts.

"So I haven't exactly been honest with you. At first, I lied to protect you, and then it just never seemed like the right time to tell you truth. But now you're old enough to handle the truth, and I hope you'll see that I did what I had to do to keep you all safe."

I share a worried look with Chase. I'm not sure what exactly Mr Davenport is about to say, but it sounds serious. I haven't heard him use this tone of voice, well, ever. I want to say something to ease the tension that has settled over the lab like a heavy blanket, but something in Mr Davenport's voice tells me that this is a time to listen.

Uh, should I go?" asks Leo. "This seems like a father-son moment and I love you Big D but you're not actually my real father."

"No, stay," Mr Davenport replies. "You're going to have to hear this eventually and anyway, I'm not actually Adam, Bree, and Chase's real father, either."

All three of us gasp collectively. Of all the bombshells he could have dropped on us, I would have never even come close to guessing that one. Looking between Chase and Leo, I can tell they're as shocked as I am. I don't know what to do now. I don't want to know any more, yet I can't move. I have so many questions swirling around in my head and I know now that things can never go back to the way they were before.

"Whoa whoa whoa, back up a bit," says Chase finally. _"What?"_

"You're genetically engineered from anonymous DNA samples. Technically I never told you that I was your biological father, but I never told you that I _wasn't_ either. You are siblings – that much is true, but we engineered you from samples from unknown donors. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. To give you the whole truth, I'm going to have to start from the very beginning."

" _We? Who's we?!"_ Chase looks like his entire life has come undone. Which wouldn't be entirely false. Right now, I don't know what to feel. Nothing I've ever known has been true.

"We being me and my brother, Douglas." Mr Davenport continued. "We founded Davenport Industries a very long time ago, before any of you were born. Of course, we didn't have nearly as much money then – just a little lab with a few gadgets we'd tinkered up. We had been working on new bionic technology to implant into robots, we were so sure that it was going to be our 'big break' into the technology world. It was going really well, developing much faster than I had thought it was going to, when I discovered that Douglas had been hiding some of his research from me.

"I found you three a couple of months before Chase was born, and by then it was too late to stop him. Douglas was clearly struggling with the two young kids he already had – Adam was two years old and barely talking and Bree was completely withdrawn – so I decided join him on his research on the condition that he didn't carry out any further unauthorised research. The technology worked better than I expected, but it wasn't completely compatible with the human nervous system – that's why you guys glitch. The human body has certain physical limitations – fatigue, for example – and emotions that robots or androids simply don't have.

"So we continued to work together for a while – he did most of the work on your bionic chips, which is why I can't tell you what your hidden abilities are or when they'll surface – a lot of the code is encrypted. That secrecy should have been an early warning sign, but I was too absorbed in everything else to notice what was going on.

"As much as it pains me to admit this to you, Douglas never saw you as anything more than science experiments. He didn't treat you as children, in fact he didn't seem to have any attachment to you at all. I wasn't until he accidentally sent some documents to the wrong computer that I realised exactly what he was planning to do with you. That's when I decided that I had to take you away – I couldn't let him program you three to become mindless soldiers. So I started building this lab in secret, so I would have a safe place to bring you.

"Unfortunately, that meant that I had to spend a lot of time away from our old lab, and he was left in charge of you. One day I came back a little earlier than usual and found the three of you in tears and Douglas yelling because you'd messed up during training. The lab wasn't finished yet, but I took you that night.

"Over the next little while I noticed things that indicated that Douglas had been treating you this way for some time. Adam would flinch away and hide every time he heard a loud noise or something moved too fast, Bree was absolutely terrified of water and panicked at every mention of bath time, and Chase flat out refused to talk until he was about five years old. It turned out that Douglas had been abusing you practically since birth and I never had a clue.

"I'm sorry that I never told you this before. I thought if you didn't know it couldn't hurt you, and it took a long time to get to where we are now. However, you do have a right to know where you came from, and I hope that you'll forgive me for keeping this from you."

He looked at us expectantly, begging someone to break the silence. I, too, wish that someone would say something, _anything_ that would help me make sense of everything I've just heard. Because I can't believe it, yet I know somewhere deep down that Mr Davenport is telling the truth.

I can't remember much of my childhood, although now I'm realising that maybe I just didn't want to. The earliest memory I can recall takes place in the same lab I'm sitting in right now, and I must have been five or six years old. I'm talking to Bree about the movie I just finished watching. She's not saying much back, or even really looking at me, but I think she's listening, because every so often I make a joke and she smiles a little. Chase sitting a small distance away, typing something on a tablet. Every so often he looks up and shows the screen to Mr Davenport, but he doesn't say a word. That's strange, because every other memory I've had of Chase involves him chattering incessantly about something I'll never understand.

I'm broken from my train of thought by Mr Davenport. "Please say something."

I look at Chase, then Leo. Both look just as speechless as I am. Chase opens his mouth, about to speak, when a faint groan interrupts the silence.

Bree stirs a little, then slowly opens her eyes. She blinks a few times, staring at us intently, but she doesn't say a word.

It's Mr Davenport who finally speaks. "Bree, are you okay? How do you feel?" he asks, reaching out a hand to help her up.

Suddenly, she's wide awake. "Don't touch me!" she cries, jerking away from him. Then, before any of us can react, there's a blur and a gust of wind, and she's gone.

 **So I'm** **not completely happy with this chapter, it's really dialogue heavy and Adam seems a little ooc to me (does anyone else find him really hard to write, or is it just me?). I also wrote it right after I finished a full day shift at work on the busiest day in months (national bookshop day, in case anyone's wondering). However, it's been so long since I put the first chapter up and 73738382867 (Guest) was kind enough to leave me a review (thank you!) so I really wanted to post this as soon as possible.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: A long chapter today, yay! I was originally planning on uploading this as two separate chapters, but I couldn't bring myself to leave you on an awful cliffhanger so you get two in one. Just a warning, this chapter is very intense and includes themes of child abuse (including implied sexual abuse). If this makes you uncomfortable, please skip this chapter. I've uploaded a fun story in the Elite Force category for you :). Please also let me know if you think I should change the overall rating of this story to an M. The rest of the story will be relatively mild but I feel like this chapter is pushing it a bit. Thanks!**

***Bree's POV***

When the darkness lifts, my world is suddenly clearer than it's ever been before. I feel as if before this – whatever 'this' is – all happened, I was watching the world through a veil. I never noticed before, but there was always a haze of uncertainty surrounding my memories. Now the veil has lifted, the haze is gone, and everything is crystal clear.

And it hurts.

The new clarity of my mind is razor sharp, all the forgotten images piercing my vision like knives. All I want is to just lie here and try to forget again, but something tells me that that isn't going to happen. Forcing my eyes open and blinking a few times to clear the lingering blur in my vision, I find myself face to face with Mr Davenport and my brothers.

The silence is deafening. I have no idea what to say, and even if I did, I wouldn't be able to say it. I'm completely frozen. Do they know what I know? How can they stand there so calmly when our entire world just fell apart?

"Bree, are you okay? How do you feel?" Mr Davenport places his hand on my arm.

That's all it takes to break the stillness and thrust me out of my frozen fear.

"Don't touch me!" I try to scream, but it comes out as more of a strangled sob. I regain control of myself and speed out of the lab before anyone has the chance to stop me.

I need to get away. To think, to feel, to cry in peace. I super speed up the stairs and down the hallway. By the time I reach the living room, there are hot streaks running down my face and my vision is so blurred I can barely see. I'm nearly out the front door, nearly free, when I suddenly hit something and we both go down.

At this point I don't have the energy to fight anymore. I just lie on the floor, unmoving, defeated.

I hear someone huff and groan next to me. "What have I told you about speeding in the house?" comes a distressed cry.

Tasha. She's scolding me, but it makes me feel better to hear her voice. I can trust Tasha, she's never lied to me. She may not understand my brothers and my bionics, but she's always accepted us as part of the family. And with that, my guard comes crashing down and I collapse into tears. I've never been one for openly crying in front of people, but I always thought I was strong. Now I remember I'm not.

I distantly register Tasha's arms wrapping around me, pulling up off the floor and onto the couch, gently rocking me as I cry helplessly into her shoulder. She's whispering into my ear, I don't know what she's saying, but it's soft and comforting. At one point I think she asks me what's wrong, but I'm beyond being able to form a coherent answer. She doesn't press it though, she just sits with me and lets me cry. I don't deserve a mother like her.

I don't know how long we sit like that. Seconds, minutes, maybe even hours. I'm just so overwhelmed, I feel like I'm having a lifetime's worth of emotion all at once. I finally bring myself back to the present when I hear Mr Davenport enter the room.

"Oh good, she's with you." He says in relief.

"Do you know what's going on?" Tasha asked. "She came crashing through here about half an hour ago and she's been inconsolable ever since."

"We have a vague idea, but we're not sure exactly why she's so upset."

Hearing Chase's voice, I turn around to see Mr Davenport accompanied by all three of my brothers. They all look extremely worried, and I start to feel bad. We've been through a lot together – more than they'll ever know – and I hate hurting them.

"Hi Bree," Mr Davenport starts, "I'm glad you're safe. Do you mind if we have a seat? We need to talk about a few things."

I nod, noticing that he asked me before he came any closer. I guess I must have scared him down in the lab.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you before," I apologise, barely above a whisper.

"It's okay," he says. "I should have realised you would be a little on edge. I imagine this is quite overwhelming for you."

"I remember everything," I answer. "Why?"

I listen as he explains my new ability, and what happened when we fought Krane. "But I think there's something else here, Bree. What's going on?"

I don't want to tell him. I don't want to tell anyone, but I especially don't want to sit here and admit to my whole family that I'm not the girl they all thought I was. That I'm weak, that I'm just a failed experiment. I think that somewhere deep down, part of me is terrified that they'll agree.

"Bree, I want to help you work whatever this is out, but first you need to trust me, okay?"

I glance towards Adam, Chase, and Leo.

"I've already told them what I know, but I think that you know something that I don't and that's why I need you to help me out here."

I look back at Tasha, and she nods encouragingly at me. I take a deep breath.

"Okay."

* * *

 _I watch as Donald leaves the lab, closing the door firmly behind him. He and Douglas have just had another fight. We aren't s'posed to know when they've been fighting, but Chasey was upset and shut himself in his capsule, so we knew he must have heard them with his super senses._

 _Douglas turns around and grins at us. I know smiles are s'posed to be nice, but I don't like it when Douglas smiles. He looks mean. "Well, it looks like I'm in charge now," he says._

 _Chasey lets himself out of his capsule and comes over to join us. He knows that he'll get in trouble if he stays there too long, and Douglas will yell. He's only a baby, but he's very very smart. Still, Adam and I stand slightly in front of him. We never know what Douglas will do when he smiles like that._

" _You boys can go off and play somewhere by yourselves. I don't care where. I'm going to do some solo training with Bree today."_

 _My stomach churns and I feel sick. Douglas never usually helps me in training, he usually just ignores me until Donald comes back. He thinks I'm not worth the effort, because I'm weak, and I'm a girl. I can feel Adam gripping my hand tightly. We all know what solo training means. It means you get yelled at a lot, and if you're really bad, you get hit._

 _There's not point fighting though, so I just take a deep breath and nod. There's one last quick squeeze on my hand and then Adam and Chasey are gone, and I'm left alone with Douglas._

 _He grabs my arm and half leads, half drags me to the small training room. There's not much in here, since we only ever use it for solo training when Donald is out. Instead of leading me to the centre of the room though, Douglas picks me up and sets me on the table._

" _Oh, you didn't think we were actually going to do training, did you?" Douglas says, showing me that awful smile again. "You know there's not much point in that, you're never going to be a soldier like Adam and Chase. I don't know how I ended up with you, but I think I've finally found a way to make you useful."_

 _I don't know what he means, so I don't say anything._

" _Do you know what makes you different from Adam and Chase?" he asks._

" _I'm a girl."_

" _Yes. And do you know what that means?"_

" _It means I'm weak, and I can't fight, and I'll never be as good as them."_

 _He looks confused for a moment, and that smile drops from his face. I don't know why he's so surprised. He's the one who told me those things, so he should know better than me._

" _Well," he says. "There is one thing you can do that Adam and Chase can't." He smiles again, but something's different this time. He almost looks pleased to see me. I don't know why, but this frightens me a lot._

 _I want to know what he means, but I'm too scared to ask. He's playing with the ends of my hair now, and I'm scared that he's going to pull it. I don't move though, I know better than that. He tucks a piece behind my ear before he leans in really close to me, so close I can feel his breath on my face and I want to pull back but this is the nicest he's ever been to me._

" _You can help me make more bionic people" he whispers in my ear._

 _I still don't say anything. I don't know how I could help with that, or why Adam and Chasey can't, but I don't want Douglas to call me stupid and be mean._

" _You're not old enough yet, but we can still practice. Don't worry, I think you'll like it."_

 _I'm still confused, but I don't have time to ask any questions because suddenly Douglas is holding me tightly and taking off my clothes. Then he starts to hurt me, and I can't stay quiet any more. I scream and try to wriggle away but he's too big for me to fight._

" _If you don't stop screaming I'll get Adam in here to help me." He threatens._

 _This only makes me more scared and I want scream even louder but I try to be quiet because if Adam sees this he will be very sad. He tries to protect me and Chasey but he's only little too and he can't stop Douglas. I shut my eyes tight in case not seeing what's happening makes it hurt less. It doesn't, really, but at least I can't see his awful smile anymore. I just lie there, focusing on the tears leaving a wet trail down my face and hoping it will all be over soon._

 _Suddenly the pain gets a lot worse and I accidentally let out a scream._

" _Bree?" I hear Donald calling out distantly. Good, he must be home. Maybe now Douglas will stop._

 _He does, and I feel relieved for a moment, he pours something on my arm and it burns worse than anything I've ever felt. He's not smiling anymore, but he looks very, very angry._

 _The door bursts open and Donald comes running in, followed by Adam and Chasey. They all look very scared._

" _What is going on in here?!" Donald yells, and I jump a little. "Why were the boys playing with my anti-gravity simulator, unsupervised, and why is Bree crying – and naked?"_

 _Douglas turns to Donald. "We were working one-on-one on her super speed and she lost control and knocked down that jar." He points at the now empty jar that he had just poured on me. "I was just about to give her a bath so the chemical doesn't permanently damage her or her bionics."_

" _Is that true, Bree?"_

 _I don't say anything. I can't even look at him. I don't know what we did, but it must be bad if Douglas is lying about it._

 _Donald sighs. "I'll take this from here. Douglas, you go make sure Adam and Chase clean up the mess they made." He wraps me in a towel before picking me up and walking towards the bathroom._

" _What happened to you, Bree?"_

" _I'm sorry."_

* * *

 **A/N: So this was really hard to write. Not only is it a really difficult theme, but I actually like Douglas and I don't believe that he's capable of being _that_ awful. Also, I wasn't sure how to show the past without having a huge chunk of dialogue, is the flashback okay? Also, I'm finished with exams now so expect a lot more updates! As always, please let me know what you think. I have a couple of ideas about where to take this story and I'd like to know your thoughts.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I was really looking forward to writing this chapter, mainly because we finally get to see Chase's POV. Don't worry, I have a plan for him so there'll be more coming up :D Anyway, sorry about the delay in getting this chapter up - uni may have finished, but working retail in the pre-Christmas period is a nightmare. Enough about me though, and on with the story - let me know what you think!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Lab Rats or any of its characters**

I can't look up. Seeing the looks of disappointment on my family's faces would only break the modicum of self-control I've been clinging to since I started my story, so I continue to stare at my hands as I fidget nervously. For the longest time, that's the only movement in the room. The silence sits heavily over us and nobody moves. I want someone to say something, _anything,_ to yell or cry or scream.

What happens instead surprises me. Gently, a hand reaches through the silence and rests over mine, stopping my anxious fidgeting. Tracing my gaze upwards, I find myself looking directly at Chase. His eyes aren't filled with anger or hatred. Instead there is sadness and love.

"He's wrong," he says.

"What?"

"Douglas. You aren't weak or a failure or bad at being bionic. He's wrong."

Chase's words seem to pull everyone else out of their shocked trance, because all of a sudden there's a flurry of movement and everyone's trying to talk all at once. It's too much, and I feel my breath catching in my chest as I close my eyes and will it to slow down. Mr Davenport must notice this because he gets everyone to back off while I take a couple of deep breaths and gather myself.

When I feel controlled enough, I glance around at my family to try and gauge their reactions. While I expect to see shock and disappointment illustrated on their faces, all that meets me is love and sadness. I can't bear to look at them, so I quickly look back down. I don't deserve their love. After everything I've just told them, they should be screaming at me. I know that what happened was really, _really_ bad. I didn't know what was happening back then, but now I know exactly what I've done, and they should hate me for it. Right?

"Bree, look at me." I don't move. " _Bree."_ I shift my gaze to meet Mr Davenport's and he nods reassuringly at me.

"Chase is right," he says. "You've worked so incredibly hard at training and you're an amazing bionic hero – just look at all the great things you've done. You being a girl has nothing to do with how strong you are."

"But if I was stronger," I answer, "I wouldn't have let this happen. I would have stopped him."

Mr Davenport looks taken aback. "This is in no way your fault. You were three years old, and Douglas was a grown man. Not only was he physically much bigger than you, but he created you – so you trusted him. He was in a position of power over you and he abused that power. This is all on him, not you. Do you understand?"

He was starting to look pretty upset, so I just nodded. I still wasn't convinced, but I didn't have the energy to argue any further.

Up to this point, Leo had been pretty quiet. Stunned silent, I guess, or just didn't know what to say. He's never really been the type for serious moments. I could use a joke right about now. The tension in the room was uncomfortably thick. He must have sensed it, because he suddenly broke his silence.

"Hey, you're the strongest girl _I_ know. Stronger than Chase, anyway." I smiled a bit as Chase slapped him lightly. "And me, I guess."

Everyone chuckled and the cold pit in my chest warmed up a little. I really do love my family, even though it's making all of this so much harder. I pull Tasha and Chase into a hug, since they're sitting right next to me, and before long everyone's piled on the couch in one big group hug and for the first time today I feel like maybe everything could be okay after all.

* * *

***Chase's POV***

As Bree was telling us what she remembered from our childhood, I found myself growing more and more horrified. I can't remember anything from that time, and although I feel guilty about it, I'm glad. I can't even begin to imagine how awful it must be to have gone through that, and then to remember it so vividly.

Then I remember. It was supposed to be me. Bree unlocked one of my hidden abilities because of a mix up with our chips and now she's suffering because of it. If it had been me, maybe this would never have happened, and life would have been more or less the same as it was yesterday.

Of course, I don't know that for certain. I don't know if I had known what Douglas was doing to Bree while it was happening. If I had known, and I did remember it, would I have told her? I don't know how we would have reacted to Mr Davenport's revelation had there not been bigger issues at hand. There are many things that I don't know, and I can't hypothesise. I'm not used to not knowing, and it scares me.

Before I can think myself too deep into the whole mess, though, I feel Bree pulling me into a hug. Adam joins on my other side and soon enough I'm filled with a warmth that melts away my worries. I realise that what happened was unexpected and entirely beyond my control. The only thing I need to worry about now is making sure that Bree is okay. I can make it up to her later.

"Guys! You're crushing me!" She calls out from the bottom of the pile of bodies heaped over the couch. It's the most normal she's sounded all day – the barely-there whisper has vanished and once again she sounds clear and confident. It gives me hope that someday, maybe even soon, everything will be back to normal.

Everyone disentangles themselves and she emerges, eyes shining and with a hint of a smile on her face.

"Well," says Leo, "I don't know if you guys noticed, but I said lunch was ready."

"Leo, that was hours ago. It's closer to dinner time now," I reply, silently thanking him for trying to re-establish normalcy.

"I don't care what time it is," cuts in Adam. "I'm starving!"

Everyone murmurs in agreement and we all move to the kitchen. That is, except for Bree. She hangs back, the hint of a smile lost somewhere in the excitement. I don't know what happened, or if anything even happened at all, but suddenly she seems distant and detached.

"You okay?" I ask.

"Hm? Yeah, I'm fine." She doesn't seem fine. Her voice is even and her expression neutral, but I've been on countless missions with her and I know what her brave face – the face she makes when she's absolutely terrified but can't or won't let the enemy know – looks like. On the outside, she's steady, sure, composed. She takes that fear and hides it behind her eyes, only to let it come pouring out later, when she's sure she's safe. If only she felt safe now.

"Sure?"

"I'm just really tired, so I think I'll skip dinner and take a nap." She heads upstairs, rather than to the lab, but if anyone else notices, they don't say anything. They probably figure she wants privacy, and maybe that is all it is. I do tend to overthink, and she would tell us if there was something bothering her. Wouldn't she?


	5. Chapter 5

***Bree's POV***

For a second there, I thought everything might be okay. I thought that maybe my family would forgive me and we could go back to our lives – just how it always was. For a second there, as I hugged my family, the emptiness inside me eased and I almost felt strong.

But then I see Chase.

He looks so hurt, so confused. I can tell he's trying to smile, to hold himself together because I was just in tears and he doesn't want to set me off again, but I know him better than anyone else in the world, except for maybe Adam, and I know when he's hurt. When I've hurt him. The conflict is written all over his face – he doesn't know what to do, and for him, that's the worst punishment I could give.

All of a sudden the weight of my family's hug is suffocating. I'm too warm, and I start to panic. I can't let anyone know, but I have to get out. Injecting as much light-heartedness into my voice as I possibly can – despite the amount of strength I have to summon just to sound normal – I call out from the bottom of the pile

"Guys! You're crushing me!"

I emerge into cool air, and despite it all, I think I'm actually smiling. The boys immediately launch into a minor squabble about food and I falter. I don't know how long I can maintain this façade, and I don't want to drag down everyone else's mood. Life goes on, but I don't know if I can. It hasn't even begun, and I'm already tired. I realise I haven't had a moment to myself since I remembered everything, and all I want is to be able to sit and think – about everything or about nothing – without having to worry about anyone else.

I distantly register everyone scrambling about in the kitchen, and Chase asking me if I'm okay. I automatically assure him I am, internally cursing myself for letting my mask slip. He's obviously not convinced, because he asks again, and I can feel my composure slowly melting into a pool of tears behind my eyes. I babble something about not being hungry and head up the stairs as quickly as I can without someone getting suspicious and following me. All I want right now is to be alone. I can't let myself hurt my family any more.

* * *

Once I'm out of sight, I let myself slow down. I make myself notice my surroundings, trailing my fingers along the textured wallpaper and counting every step. I can't let myself panic now. I have to get a grip. I take deep breaths, savouring each one for two steps before exhaling slowly with an audible sigh. I notice that the air is fresh, and it smells like it might rain. Someone must have left a window open somewhere. Once again I'm reminded that life goes on, but this time it doesn't worry me. Unlike people, weather doesn't change. It rains, it shines, and it repeats. If only my life was so predictable.

I've passed eighteen doors and taken sixty-two steps by the time I reach the end of the hallway to discover that there was indeed an open window, and outside dark clouds were gathering low over Mission Creek. I slowly pull it closed, relishing the gentle thudding sound it makes. I let myself into the room at the very end of the hall, again listening for the soft click of the door closing behind me.

I've never been in this room before – after all, the house is so big and there's really no reason for me to be upstairs a lot – but it's beautiful. It's some sort of conservatory, with tall windows stretching right up to and over the ceiling. From here, I can see all of Mission Creek nestled under the soft cloud cover. Even though the sun is almost set and it's pretty dark, I leave the lights off. I want to be able to watch over the whole town without anybody outside being able to see me. For a moment, I want to hide. Seeing, but unseen. It's truly beautiful from up here. Far away in the distance the sun is slowly sinking into the sea, staining the soft clouds in a spectrum of coral shades. Matchbox cars crawl lazily along the streets and I wonder about the people in them. Are they going home? What's waiting for them behind their front doors? Do they have families who love them even when they've done something terrible?

The rain is finally starting to fall now. It shrouds the town in a muted haze and smears the colours of the sunset past the horizon. I imagine the people in their tiny cars turning on their wipers and scurrying up their front steps. Somehow, nothing seems real anymore. I watch absentmindedly as the rain becomes heavier and my head fills with its steady thrumming on the roof. Soon, drops are hitting the window and trailing down in erratic paths.

* * *

" _Whoa! Guys, look outside, it's raining!" Adam calls across the living room._

 _I race over to see for myself, with Chase following closely behind. "Wow," I breathe. "It's amazing"_

" _I never thought it would be so loud," Chase contemplates. "The acceleration of the drops must generate a significant amount of force to compensate for their relatively small mass."_

 _Adam looks at him in bewilderment, but I stopped listening a little while ago. I'm fascinated by the rain, only having seen it before in pictures. That's the thing about secret underground labs: they have no windows. I know that a lot of people don't like rain, and eventually I'll probably grow weary of it too – it doesn't seem easy to run in – but right now I think I'd be able to sit and watch it all day. It feels refreshing, like every time it rains, a little bit of the world is cleansed, yesterday's troubles washed away and ready to start fresh again._

" _Hey, what are you guys doing over there?" Leo asks as he enters the room to find us all huddled around the window._

" _It's raining!" exclaims Adam._

" _Oh, are you racing raindrops?"_

 _We all look at him blankly. Racing raindrops?_

" _You've never had rain races?" Leo asks in disbelief "I am about to open up a whole new_ world _for you guys."_

 _And so he shows us how to pick a winning drop – a good, heavy one, with fewer obstacles in its path – and we raced all afternoon. It's a child's game, Leo said, but a classic. Chase won most of the races, but sometimes even he couldn't predict the path the drops would follow. Sometimes you'd have it all planned out, but then your drop goes and does something unexpected. It's a bit like life, really. Nobody really knows what's going to happen next._

 _I sit by the window long after my brothers have moved on._

* * *

I wonder if Adam and Chase remember the first time we saw the rain, or if they've even thought about it since. I don't think I had before now. Back then there were new things to see every day, and over time they all blurred into each other. It's funny how you can become so accustomed to something that you forget to see the beauty and the pain of it all. Everything just, well, _is._

I pull my knees up to my chest and lean my head back against the wall. I pick two raindrops and watch them race down the glass. If the one on the left wins, I'll listen to my family, I'll forgive myself. If the one on the right wins, I deserve everything I get.

I fall asleep before they reach the end.

* * *

 **A/N: Sorry about the super long wait, I got a little stuck on this chapter, but thank you so much to the reviewers who motivated me to stick with it and finally get it up. You guys are the best! As always, let me know what you think, your predictions for the story and what you want to see happen. Thanks for reading!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: So, it's been a while. Sorry about that :( Work and Christmas left me insanely busy and exhausted so I simply haven't had the time or energy to write recently but hopefully now things have calmed down update should come much more steadily. I'm hoping for the next chapter of this story to be set around the new year so expect a very prompt update! Also, I'm considering starting a prequel to this story about the kids immediately after Donald rescued them, what do you guys think? Thank you all so much for sticking with me and this story, I hope you enjoy this latest chapter!**

***Adam's POV***

Bree wasn't in the lab when I came down last night, and when I glance over to her capsule, it's still empty. I know she hasn't been here all night because every time I woke up, I looked for her. Several times I was met by Chase's worried gaze. I don't think either of us slept very well. Everything that happened yesterday caught up with us the minute we had a moment alone to think, and my thoughts plagued me well into the night.

Chase is usually up and out of the lab long before me, but today he's sitting at the cyber desk looking at some files. I don't say anything, but I'm thankful. I don't think either of us want to go upstairs alone. I look at him and he wordlessly gets up to follow me upstairs.

What we walk into is surprisingly normal. Quieter than usual, but that's probably because I'm not there yet. I start pouring myself a bowl of my usual cereal and for once Chase doesn't say anything about the amount of sugar in my choice. In fact, he makes some for himself.

"Good morning!" chirps Tasha. "Bree not with you guys?"

I think Chase shakes his head, but I just ignore her and reach for the milk. I'm starting to understand this 'not a morning person thing' a little better.

"Oh. Well I'll just take some breakfast down to the lab for her, then."

"Well that'll be a waste of time," I mumble, "because she's not down there."

Mr Davenport's head shoots up in alarm and he drops his toast. It lands only half on the plate. "What do you mean, she's not there? Where is she?"

"Don't worry, she's in the house," Chase cuts in before everyone can get into too big of a frenzy. "I checked her GPS this morning. She's probably upstairs."

Tasha grabs a granola bar and heads towards the stairs. "I'm going to go check on her anyway and make sure she's okay."

"I'll come with you," Mr Davenport says.

"That might not be the best idea" Tasha replies.

"But what if –"

"I'm sure she's fine, Donald. I've got it."

I don't know what they're talking about so I just do what I usually do and sit down opposite Leo.

"Race?" he asks me.

I desperately want something to be normal so I agree, silently thanking him for being the one person in this house who isn't tiptoeing around and acting all weird. However, when I put the first spoonful of cereal in my mouth, I feel like I'm trying to eat cardboard. The bland texture rolls over my tongue and I struggle to swallow it down. I put my spoon back in the bowl and listlessly push the cereal around the sides until Leo announces that he's done.

"Well it looks like you got me." I say. "Bree said you would, someday."

Everyone goes quiet after that. For a moment I had forgotten all about yesterday and everything had briefly shifted back into place. But it can't be like that anymore. Everything has changed.

I hate change. For seventeen years my life stayed exactly the same. I lived in the lab with Bree and Chase and every morning we got up, ate power pellets and trained. Sometimes Mr Davenport would cut his hair, or he'd bring us a special treat from outside, or there was even that day that Chase finally started talking, but usually I knew exactly what to expect from each day.

When we met Leo and we left the lab, a lot of things changed. It was scary, but most of it was good changes. As it turns out, upstairs is definitely a lot better than the lab. It's been a while now, and I barely even notice the hundreds of little things that changed that day.

No matter how hard I try, though, I can't see any way that this change could be good.

I could kill Douglas for what he's done to our family.

* * *

***Bree's POV***

 _I crouch behind my capsule, trying to keep my breath even and quiet. My heart is pounding so loud inside my chest that I'm sure he can hear me. I remember the breathing exercises Donnie taught me to help with my running. In, hold, out. In, hold, out._

" _Watcha doing?"_

 _I freeze, barely managing to not glitch and take off, but it's only Adam._

" _I'm hiding," I whisper. "We need to stay very, very quiet."_

" _Are you playin hide'n seek?"_

 _I glance at him quizzically._

" _I saw it on the TV box. One person hides and the other one's gotta find 'em. I found you, so now it's my turn to hide!" He runs off without another word._

 _I go back to my breathing. In, hold, out. In, hold, out. I can hear heavy footsteps approaching and I silently hope it's Donnie but the scuffling sound of Douglas' thick boots tells me I'll be disappointed._

 _In, hold, out._

" _I can see you, Bree. Your capsule's made of glass."_

 _I squeeze my eyes tightly shut. He can't see me now. Inholdout, inholdout. All I hear is a deep sigh and suddenly a large hand clamps around my arm and I'm being yanked upwards._

" _Open your eyes, you stupid girl!" he demands, starting to shake me back and forth. "Get up!"_

 _I can't help myself now, I know it'll only get me in more trouble, but I'm crying. Wet tears sliding down my face, I want to scream but all that comes out is a whimper. I'm trapped, I'm scared. Why won't it stop?_

Suddenly, it does stop. The voice softens, my head stops spinning, and I open my eyes. Tasha is lightly shaking my shoulder, whispering gentle shushing sounds into my ear. I pull away.

"Tasha," I breathe in relief.

"Bree," she replies. "Good morning."

I don't know what to say, because it isn't a good morning. I just look at her.

She sighs. "Do you want to talk about it? Sometimes it helps, when you have a bad dream, to tell somebody. They can help share the load for you."

Still I say nothing. How did she even know?

As if she read my mind, she says "You were crying out. In your sleep."

There's a long silence before I finally speak. "It wasn't too terrible," I say. "It was just something I haven't thought about in a long time."

Tasha takes this in for a moment before nodding. "Do you just want to sit here for a while then?"

I nod in reply and we spend the whole morning up in the conservatory, just sitting and watching the tiny townspeople go about their daily lives. Sometimes we talk – about nothing, really – but mostly we sit in silence and appreciate that just for once, we can be still.


	7. Chapter 7

One Month Later

***Chase's POV***

We work together seamlessly, silently in training. This is the eighth time we've run through this simulation and I'm basically on autopilot at this point so I allow my mind to wander – as much as I'm able to, anyway. I find myself contemplating the past few weeks. There's been a definite shift in our dynamic since that day we learned where we really came from, and it hasn't been all good.

We've all become much more distant towards each other. I miss the training sessions where we'd be able to make a joke when something went wrong or lend a helping hand without anyone flinching at the contact. Now we work next to each other, but not together. You could almost drown in the silence that lays thick between us.

Adam holds a deep anger that I've never seen a trace of before inside him. Despite his super strength and the infamous bionic brother toss, he never used to be casually violent. Now he spends a lot of extra time doing combat training – often working so long and hard that Mr Davenport has to force him to stop. At first I thought he just wanted a distraction, but once, in a rare moment of confidence, he told me that he never wanted to be unable to protect us again. That's how I know that the love is still there.

Bree, on the other hand, only ever comes to the lab to sleep or for training. Sometimes not even then. She spends long periods of time somewhere upstairs, either completely alone or with Tasha. I don't know what they talk about, but she's always a tiny bit brighter after they've talked. Even when she's in the same room as us, she's not really there. Her mind is always either completely and painfully focused on whatever task she's doing, or somewhere else entirely. Even if I could talk to her, I don't know what I'd say.

I spend most of my free time with Leo, now. I never really understood him before, but now he's the only person who I truly know where I stand with. Honestly, I'm thankful for the shred of normalcy that he's maintained in this family. He still races Adam at breakfast, walks with us to school, and cracks his usual cringe worthy jokes between classes. The only sign of this all affecting him at all is that his grades have raised slightly as he throws himself into school work to escape the silence.

My train of thought is abruptly broken when Adam trips over and falls onto me. I swing my arm out to maintain my balance and Bree charges full speed into the rock wall.

" _Adam,_ " I groan in frustration while Bree cries out my own name from where she landed on the floor.

"I didn't do anything! It was Adam!" I protest.

"You used your molecular kinesis to fling me into the wall," she groans in explanation. "Ow, I think I broke something."

"Okay, that's it," Mr Davenport finally intervenes. "No more training today. Bree, Chase, come see me."

Bree and I glance at each other in shock. Mr Davenport's been pretty detached during training lately and hasn't attempted to resolve a squabble between us in weeks. I think he figures if he can't fix the big problem, there's no point with the rest. I help Bree up, noticing she's holding her left hand protectively against her chest. We go over and look at him expectantly.

"All right, what hurts?"

"My wrist," Bree replies. "I put my arm out to stop myself but I couldn't. Why did you push me so hard?" she asks me.

"I didn't!" I protest again. I think this is the longest conversation we've had all month.

Mr Davenport doesn't say anything, just takes Bree's wrist and gently examines it. For a few minutes, it's silent but for Bree's quiet gasping as Mr Davenport hits a tender spot.

"It's not broken," he eventually concludes. "Just badly sprained. I'll wrap it up and you'll have to sit out on training for a while, but you'll be fine in a couple of weeks at the most. Now, you're sure you didn't just glitch?"

Bree just nods.

He sighs. "Okay, Chase, what happened?"

"I… I don't know." I really don't think my molecular kinesis glitched, but I can't think of anything else that could explain it. "I swear I didn't do anything. I was just going through the simulation then suddenly Adam fell on me and I lost my balance. I wasn't even thinking about Bree." I leave out the part where I was essentially daydreaming.

"Hm. Well, obviously something happened. I'm going to check both of your chip logs." A brief quiet settles over us while Mr Davenport opens the files. Quiet seems to have become the norm around here lately. I wordlessly get out the first aid kit and start to wrap Bree's wrist. She doesn't protest, which at this point I'm counting as a success. I glance up every so often while I wrap, but her gaze remains firmly fixed on the floor.

"Huh," Mr Davenport finally breaks the silence. "Apparently, neither of you glitched. Chase, you unlocked a new ability which you accidentally used on Bree when you lost your balance. Force amplification." I must look shocked because he continues. "It's similar to your molecular kinesis with an element of super strength – I'm guessing it's another side effect of you guys combining your bionics to fight Krane. Basically, you can manipulate the amount of energy emitted by on object. In this case, you took the kinetic energy that Bree had and multiplied it."

"So, my fault then. Sorry, Bree."

She actually almost smiles. "It's okay. Good luck with your new ability."

* * *

At first, I was happy for Chase unlocking his new ability. But the more I thought about it, the more I realised that it wasn't fair. He got an ability, while I got a curse. A curse that has driven my entire family into an uncomfortable silence. I know that life is never fair – I know that possibly more than anyone – but I still wish it was. Maybe then I wouldn't be sitting here, alone, trying to ignore the throbbing pain in my wrist and desperately fighting the tears gathering behind my eyes.

I'm completely lost in thought when the door to the conservatory cracks open and Tasha looks in.

"We're all going to sit outside and watch the fireworks soon. We'd love it if you'd like to join us."

She then leaves and I take a moment to gather myself before following her downstairs. I find everyone sitting in the driveway and I join them with a small smile but don't say anything because Mr Davenport is apparently sharing his – very lengthy – resolutions.

"… Finally, and most importantly, I want to make a conscious effort to be there for my kids and my family. We've faced a lot of changes recently, and they've left us divided and distant. But somethings got to change, and the New Year seems to be the perfect time for it. If I only get the chance to realise one resolution next year, I want it to be this one.

I know he means well, and I really do feel the love behind his words, but I can't help but feel guilty. It's my fault that our family is falling apart. If I hadn't unlocked this stupid ability then I would never have dredged up all these old secrets and everyone would have been happy, just like we were before.

Tasha goes next, resolving to learn to cook and start going to yoga classes – she invited me to join her, and maybe I will – and to actually win the award she was nominated for earlier this year.

Adam mumbles something about getting stronger and faster and paying more attention on missions before quickly passing over to me. I don't know what to say. I haven't put any thought into it at all – I barely even registered that the New Year was approaching at all. Time doesn't really mean much when you remember every moment like it only happened yesterday. Everyone's looking at me expectantly, though, so I decide to just speak simply and candidly.

"My resolution is to forgive myself, and to forgive the people who have hurt me in the past. I just want to be happy again."

Everyone looks briefly taken aback, but thankfully Chase starts with his resolutions before it becomes too awkward. I don't think anyone was expecting me to be so honest, or to even say much at all. I don't listen much to Chase and Leo – my heart is racing from the huge risk I just took telling everyone my true feelings.

They'll think I'm weak now.

And even as the fireworks explode over Mission Creek and my family all let down their walls for the first time in weeks, smiling and hugging and laughing, I don't feel like celebrating. The words replay themselves over and over in my head.

 _Forgive myself._

 _Be happy._

 _They'll think I'm weak._

 **A/N: As promised, a fast update! New year was two and a half hours ago so the second half of this chapter is fittingly based around resolutions. What did you guys think? A couple of you have left suggestions in the reviews, and I promise I'm trying my very hardest to work them. Please keep leaving reviews and suggestions, I love getting feedback so I can improve my writing. Thank you!**


	8. Chapter 8

My dreams through the night were haunted with those words – _I'm weak, I'm weak, I'm weak_ – but I wake in the morning with fresh determination. New year, _old_ me. I'm going to prove to myself, to my family, and most of all to Douglas, that I most certainly am not weak. If I can slow a train from 400 miles per hour to nothing in less than a minute I should easily be able to get over a few nasty memories. Right?

So this morning, instead of heading straight up to the conservatory, I grab something that isn't a granola bar and join my family for breakfast. I take my old seat opposite Chase and he looks mildly surprised but doesn't say anything. Nobody says anything. It's too quiet and my mind is screaming at me to just accept it – it's my fault, anyway – but I take a breath and remind myself that if I don't do this now, I'm never going to.

"Good morning!" I chirp brightly. Everyone looks at me in shock. Adam drops his spoon into his cereal and Leo charges ahead for the win.

"Good morning," Chase answers carefully.

"I won!" Leo exclaims.

And the ice is broken. Just like that, we're talking again, joking, laughing. I notice Chase glancing sideways at me every so often, and I can feel Mr Davenport's intense gaze drilling into me all through breakfast, but it's progress.

* * *

I do end up in the conservatory, later, but only because the boys are playing video games and I don't know what else to do with myself. Besides, being happy is kind of exhausting. I'm watching the buses trundle around Mission Creek on their unchanging journeys when I hear a soft knock on the door.

"Come in," I say, expecting Tasha. But it's not her; it's Mr Davenport.

"Hi, Bree"

"Hi," I reply uncertainly.

He comes over and sits next to me. "What are you watching?" he asks.

I'm glad he's not facing me, because it makes it easier to be honest. "The buses," I answer. "Every day, they follow the same route. The whole town races frantically around them, every day something different, but the buses never change. And you can rely on them, you know? You could wait at the corner of Summerhill and Sycamore every day, and a bus would come at quarter past ten to take you where you needed to go."

Mr Davenport smiles a little. "When you kids were little, I used to come up here every night to take a picture of the sky for you. Adam liked to see the lights of the town at night, Chase tracked the stars and mapped constellations, and you liked how the sky was a different colour every evening. The lab didn't change a lot, but seeing the changing colours of the sky let you know that time kept on marching forward."

I feel a smile grow on my face at his words. It's funny how things change. My good memories got a little lost in the chaos that's been residing in my mind recently, but I can still remember them clear as day, as long as I go looking for them. I wonder if Adam and Chase remember these little things, bedtime rituals that somehow dissipated with age. Mr Davenport and I sit in silence for a while, just thinking about those long-ago nights where we clung to every little shred of hope we could find. We found great comfort in knowing that there was a whole world out there, bigger and more spectacular than we could ever imagine.

"How are you holding up, Bree?" Mr Davenport finally asks.

"I'm good," I say, simply.

He turns to me with a look that says _that's not good enough._

I sigh. "Maybe not good," I admit. "But I'm okay. I wasn't, for a while. Everything came as such a shock and I was swallowed up in the intensity of it all, but I'm better now. Every day I wake up and the emptiness inside me is a little smaller, the weight on my shoulders a little lighter. As long as I push away the bad memories, and focus on the good ones, one day soon it'll be like nothing ever went wrong." I know it's true as soon as the words leave my lips. I need to remember the rain races and the sky pictures and forget about Douglas. Well, as much as I'm ever going to be able to forget Douglas.

"Are you sure that's all it'll take?"

"I'll be just fine, Mr Davenport. I promise."

Mr Davenport looks conflicted, but doesn't press me any further. This is the most genuine conversation we've had in weeks and neither of us want to push the other away. And so we dance around each other, a mask of deception held high as we delicately take each step. I don't know to what extent he's hiding from me, but somewhere deep down I know that there's some semblance of truth in my words. There _are_ good things to focus on, and I _can_ be okay. Maybe it's not as easy as I'm leading myself and Mr Davenport to believe, but I can do it.

Right?

 **A/N: So is Bree finally starting to move past what's happened to her and recover? Or do you think she's kidding herself? To the guest reviewer who requested more family fluff, the next chapter is just for you! I hope you're all enjoying the story so far, I'm not feeling a lot of response but I'm sticking by the saying "no news is good news." As always, if there's something you did or didn't like, or something you want to see more of, please let me know. I love hearing from you all!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: As requested, some Davenfamily fluff! Just a quick note on this chapter as it can be confusing: italicised text represents the past, while just regular text is set in the present. I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

Apparently, my wishful thinking has some effect, because Mr Davenport cancels training the next day.

"Adam practically trains himself these days, Bree's injured, and I haven't worked out how to train Chase's new ability yet, so you can have. the day off."

We all start to cheer, but Mr Davenport stops us. "I did, however, find something else," he says as he places a box on the cyber desk. Inside are several stacks of DVDs and a few old VHS tapes.

"What's all this?" I ask cautiously.

"More importantly, what are _these_?" Leo asks incredulously as he picks up one of the tapes.

We all turn to look at Mr Davenport, demanding an explanation.

"When I first rescued you from Douglas, I used to record footage of you guys so I could track your progress. The earlier stuff is on video tapes because believe it or not, I wasn't always this rich, and I didn't have the time to invent DVDs myself – although I totally could have – because you three were quite a handful."

"Aw, you made home movies of us?" Adam asks.

"It was for science!" Mr Davenport protests. "Anyway, I thought you guys might like to see them. It's about time I let all of you know about your childhood."

Silently I wonder if this came from the conservation we had yesterday. I will admit, it has been hard not being able to talk to my brothers about anything because they just don't remember. It's easy to forget just how clueless I was before I unlocked my eidetic memory, but when I think about it, I understand. What little we did remember was well faded by time. I would never wish my ability on Adam and Chase, but I'm glad they'll get to see some of their childhood.

I'm interrupted from my thoughts by Chase. "Looks like this one's the earliest," he says, sliding a tape labelled "October 2001" into a slot on the console.

After some difficulty, we finally get the tape to work and a somewhat grainy image of the lab appears.

* * *

 _Mr Davenport points the camera towards a very young Chase who is sitting on several pillows at Mr Davenport's desk and typing on a computer that's bigger than he is._

"Wow Chase, it's hard to imagine you being even smaller than you are now." Adam interrupts. Chase just elbows him hard in the ribs.

" _What are you working on, Chase?" Mr Davenport asks. Chase says nothing, but points to the computer screen where he's solving 11_ _th_ _grade math problems. Suddenly distracted – unusual for Chase even at that age – he turns away from his problems and points inquisitively at the camera._

" _It's a camera. You use it to record a moving pictures of things." Mr Davenport explains. Noticing Chase glance towards the television, he elaborates "Yes. Like the movies that you watch with Adam and Bree. I'll let you have a look later, if you like."_

 _Chase simply nods._

"Why so quiet, Chase?" Leo asks. "Nowadays we can't get you to stop talking."

"He didn't say a word until he was three and a half," Mr Davenport says. "Then one day he just started talking in full and complete sentences, no trouble at all. I still don't know why."

I know, because he told me. That's something everyone's better off not knowing, though, so I keep quiet.

" _Where are Adam and Bree, anyway?" Mr Davenport asks. Chase, once again fully engrossed in his math problems, gestures vaguely towards the rock wall._

 _Mr Davenport heads over only to find Adam halfway up the rock wall and Bree nowhere in sight._

" _Adam, you know you're not supposed to climb that unsupervised." Adam just looks at him blankly. "You can't climb it unless somebody's watching to make sure you don't get hurt," he corrects himself._

" _But I'm not!" Adam protests. "Bree's watching me."_

 _Mr Davenport just shakes his head. "Bree's not big enough to catch you if you fall. Besides, she's not even here."_

" _Yes I am!" Bree calls from somewhere above the pair, causing Mr Davenport to look up in alarm._

" _Okay, well would both of you please come down now?" Bree is by his side in an instant, but Adam takes his time carefully climbing down the wall._

I find myself shocked by how small I look next to Adam – who towered over me even way back then. I've never been tall, but I didn't realise just how tiny I used to be. At nearly three years old, I was only a fraction bigger than Chase who was barely two.

" _Bree, how did you get up so high? You've never done that in training."_

" _I just stuck to the wall."_

" _You… stuck to the wall?"_

" _Yeah," Bree answers, like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "It's much easier than how you tell me to do it."_

" _She can do that?!" Adam exclaims._

" _No," Mr Davenport replies simply. "Bree, please don't make up stories."_

We all look at Mr Davenport.

"Oops," he says guiltily.

" _Sorry, Donnie."_

" _Mr Davenport."_

" _Sorry"_

* * *

" _This is the rock wall… that's the room where all our training stuff is… these are our capsules, where we sleep… and this is the sider desk, which is a silly name because it's in the middle… there's Chase and Bee – they're playing checkers but they don't make pretty patterns like me… here's Mr Donnie, he said he's doing something very important so leave him alone –"_

" _Adam! Is that my camera? Come on, you know you're not supposed to touch that."_

* * *

" _Hey, do you guys know how to play tag?"_

" _What's that?" Bree asks while Chase just nods._

"Oh, I remember that day," I say. "Spoiler alert: not Adam's best idea ever."

"Of course you remember. You remember everything."

"Yeah but I don't think about it all at once. Like, if I ask you what you wore yesterday, you could tell me, but otherwise you don't think about it at all.

"Huh," Chase mumbles. "Interesting."

" _I saw it on the TV. One person is It and they have to try and catch someone else to make them It. But you can't be It cause you're too fast and it's not fair."_

" _Well no cause Chasey's got to be It."_

 _Chase looks at her questioningly._

" _Because your name's Chase, so you have to do the chasing." Bree answers as if it were totally obvious._

" _Okay but you still can't use your super speed."_

" _I'm not allowed to use my super speed unless we're training."_

" _Okay," says Adam. "As long as you promise."_

 _Chase, tired of waiting, claps his hands to signal 'go' and Adam and Bree take off in opposite directions. Adam gets all the way to the capsules before realising there's nowhere else to go, and Bree takes a lap around the cyber desk before meeting a pair of very tall legs._

" _Don– Mr Dad-enport"_

Leo sniggers. "Dad-enport. That's great."

" _I – I didn't see you there." And with that she glitches, speeding around the lab several times before finally falling to the floor after colliding with Chase – who proudly taps her on the shoulder and half-runs away._

* * *

We watch the videos for the rest of the day, Mr Davenport cheering when Adam and I pronounce his name right for the first time and when Chase finally said his first words. We all sit together and watch ourselves grow from scared little kids to the childhood we can actually remember, and it's the best day I've had in a long time. We laugh when one of Adam's 'great ideas' backfires, we cry when sometimes things weren't looking so great, and we tease Mr Davenport about his occasionally clueless parenting style.

But the thing that I like best about the videos is how my brothers seem to understand me more after watching them. I can say "remember when" and they actually do sort of remember. We talk for hours afterwards, staying up in the lab much later than we usually do, and I feel actually happy. Not the fake happy that I've been forcing lately, but genuine happiness – the kind that doesn't make you feel exhausted at the end of the day.

That night, for the first time in weeks, I sleep peacefully.

* * *

 **A/N: Thank you to everyone who is following/favouriting/reviewing! It really means a lot to me and it's very motivating - as always, if there's something you want to see in the story, _please_ let me know. I always love getting suggestions! One more thing, I'm thinking of doing a sort of prequel to this story. Either a series of oneshots about Donald raising the kids after rescuing them from Douglas, or a story revolving around Chase and why he doesn't speak. What do you guys think?**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thank you for being so patient with the wait for this chapter - it's been nearly a month, I'm so so sorry! I went overseas and then when I got back I was overwhelming busy with work, but now that I'm preparing to go back to university (ie. procrastinating), updates should be coming steadily. In fact, I _promise_ to have the next chapter up within the next few days (It's all planned out, just gotta write it down!) Anyway, enough of my rambling, on with the story!**

The next morning I join Adam and Chase in training – in mind as well as body. I've been holding back recently, but I know that when school starts again, it's going to be much harder to catch up. I can't dwell on the past forever. I have a purpose to serve – despite what Douglas may have told me – and I'll be damned if I'm not going to serve it. Besides, I don't really know how to be anything else.

Unfortunately, it's not that easy. After several weeks of minimal activity, my control over my bionics has significantly declined. I'm weaker, my hits are sluggish, and I can't seem to find the rhythm that used to come so naturally to me. Part of that comes from my injury, I know that. Striking with only my right hand throws me slightly off balance and breaks my concentration. But I'm still frustrated. Just when I decide to let the past stay behind me, and begin to move forward again, some obstacle comes along and pushes me three steps back.

Still, though, I'm determined to win. I take a deep breath, adjust my posture, align my next kick, and miss. I stumble back, glaring at the dummy. If I can't even hit an unmoving target, how am I supposed to defend myself against a real person?

"If looks could kill, you'd have this one in the bag."

Ignoring Adam, I regather my concentration. He can't rattle me now. I tighten my ponytail and prepare myself for my next attack. One foot in front of the other, shoulder width apart, bouncing lightly on the balls of my feet. Still, I miss.

"You're thinking too much."

I sigh. He's not going to leave me alone, and it's unnerving having him watch me so intently.

"Adam, I have to think, or I'm going to do it wrong. Do you want me back on missions or not?"

"You need to feel more. You have to want to win. Otherwise you get stuck."

"He's right," Chase cuts in. "You've been doing this since you could walk. You know how to fight, it's deeply engrained in your mind – it's instinctive. When you think too much, you start to second-guess your instincts and that's when you make mistakes."

He doesn't stick around for me to object, instead turning back his dummy and delivering a powerful kick squarely into its chest.

I watch them train for a while. I've never really paid much attention before, but I can see now that although Chase's fighting style is technical and calculated, his hits striking with pinpoint accuracy, he's not actively planning the attack. His face doesn't bear the thoughtful expression he wears when he does homework or hacks a server during a mission. Furrow in his brow and eyes slightly narrowed, his expression is ice cold, something I've never seen in him before.

Adam, on the other hand, has fire behind his eyes. His gaze never leaves his target, and the force of his hits pushes him back slightly each time. He swings wildly, but each hit is effective. Every aspect of him screams with power, from the way he squares his shoulders to the grunts he exerts with each strike. I can see his rage, and the power it gives him.

He must sense me watching him, because he stops and looks back at me. The anger is gone.

"How do you do that?" I ask.

"Remember when Mr Davenport was teaching us how to activate our bionics," he explains, "and he told us to think about something that made us angry, or frustrated, or scared?"

"Yeah," I reply. "You do?"

"A little. Anyway, I still do it sometimes. I think about someone who makes me really, really angry, and I pretend that the training dummy is that person."

I don't know what to say, because whoever that person is, they've sparked a lot of anger in my usually mellow brother. Who hurt him?

"Try it," he urges. "Who makes you feel something so strongly that you just can't hold it in anymore?"

I look up at him, only to find him staring straight back at me expectantly. That wasn't a rhetorical question. Should I tell him?

"Douglas," I answer, so quietly it's nearly under my breath. If he's startled by my answer, he doesn't let it show.

"So pretend that's him," he says, gesturing at my dummy. "Show him what you're made of." And with that he goes back to his own training.

So I have no choice but to turn back to my own dummy. I try to push down the rising thoughts about stance and posture and balance. I stare at the dummy, picturing it with Douglas' stupid spiked up hair and 'guyliner.' I imagine his sinister sneer looking down on me – I'm probably nearly his height by now, but in my mind he still towers over me – and I feel the fear creeping in. My heart is pounding, every beat pushing me closer and closer to the edge.

" _You're too weak."_

His voice echoes in my head, mean and gravelly. I desperately try to get a grip on my emotions, to turn my fear into anger and then power. I can't panic now.

" _You'll never be able to do it"_

He's taunting me, purposely trying to wind me up so I'll prove him right. I won't let him win. I take a deep breath, pulling my fear in tightly, and then letting it go. It charges through me, propelling me forward with power I've never felt before. I feel like I'm flying, my hits landing with such accuracy that there's little resistance. There's just kick after punch after kick. I keep going until there are tears streaming down my face and someone's pulling me back.

"Bree, you need to stop now. Stop! You're going to hurt yourself. Stop!"

I collapse to the floor, panting. I'm exhausted, but for the first time in a long time, I feel strong. Douglas can't reach me now.

"Um, wow," Adam exclaims. "When I said use your feelings, I didn't know you had so many. Are you okay?"

I finally notice that everyone is staring at me. "Yeah," I assure them. "I feel great, actually."

They don't look convinced.

"Honestly. I needed to do that, to let everything go. I feel a lot better, I'll be fine.

I'm not lying. My head feels clearer than it has in weeks, the cloud of uncertainty that hung over me now gone. All of a sudden I feel lighter, and I don't wish for the ground to open up and swallow me whole. A weight has lifted, another burden relieved, and I've proven to myself that I can be strong. This is just a setback. A big one, but not impossible to overcome. Nothing can take me down, not forever.

* * *

Later that night, just as we're getting ready to go to bed, I suddenly realise something.

"Hey, Adam?"

"Yeah?"

"Who's your person? You know, that makes you angry."

There's a long pause, and I think he's not going to answer. Maybe I shouldn't have asked. But then he speaks, so quietly I almost don't hear him.

"Same as you."

 **A/N: Just a heads up - the next chapter will contain some difficult themes (more detail in the A/N at the beginning of that chapter). Last time I wrote a heavy chapter, I also uploaded a fluffy oneshot for readers who didn't feel comfortable reading the chapter - I'll probably do that again, so if you have any requests for it, leave me a review and I'll see what I can do!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: This chapter is _intense_ (and a little confusing in parts, but all will become clear next chapter, so don't worry). Trigger warning for suicidal themes, so if this upsets you, please don't read. I don't want any of you getting hurt or upset - take care of yourselves!**

* * *

It isn't until a few days later that I decide to join Adam in one of his not-so-secret workout sessions. Not because I want the extra training, although I do need it, but because Adam spends a lot of time down here, and I miss hanging out with him. I just want my brothers back, so we can be normal again.

"Hey, Adam."

He jumps a little as I greet him. "How did you know I was down here?"

"Everyone knows. It's the worst kept secret ever. Can I join you?"

He looks at me strangely, but nods, so I set the treadmill to 20 miles per hour – a fast sprint for most people, but a light jog for me – and start running. We work beside each other in silence for a while, me gradually upping the speed on the treadmill and him working through his weights. I'm wondering if I should say something to punctuate the silence when he beats me to it.

"I remember too, you know."

I stumble slightly. "What?"

"Not everything, like you do. But I was four years old when we moved here – old enough to start remembering things."

"You remember Douglas?" I manage to say his name without breaking down, or even flinching, and that's how I know that even though I feel like I'm going nowhere, I am getting better.

He shakes his head. "I think Mr Davenport worked hard to make us forget him. But I remember when we did remember him, if that makes sense. I remember jumping every time the lab doors slid open, in case it was him, and I remember when you used to sleep in my capsule because you had nightmares."

Those things weren't on Mr Davenport's videos. He really did remember.

I want to ask him more, to find out why he never said anything before, but I suddenly lose my footing and fly off the treadmill. I guess this isn't really the type of conversation you should have while running at 200 miles per hour. I hit the wall behind me and fall to the floor, pain radiating from my not quite healed wrist.

"Bree!" Adam immediately sets down his weights and rushes over to help me up. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, it's not like I haven't done this a hundred times before. Occupational hazard," I joke, even though I don't actually feel fine.

He still looks concerned, but considerably less so. "Still, you should probably stop there for today."

I just nod and head upstairs. I need some ice. When I get to the elevator, I examine my wrist. I'm sure I landed on it, and it hurts like nothing else, but it looks absolutely fine. Hopefully, that means I haven't done any further damage.

There's no one in the kitchen when I come up. I breathe a sigh of relief. I'd rather not have to explain to Mr Davenport that I made yet another poor decision which resulted in me aggravating my injury and possibly prolonging its healing time. I don't need that right now.

I'm looking in the freezer for an ice pack when I remember there's a box of painkillers in the cupboard that Mr Davenport gave me when I hurt myself in the first place. The cupboard's a complete mess, and it takes me a while to find the right box. I finally locate it though, and pull it out – along with half the contents of the cupboard, which fall to the floor. Because of course that would happen to me today.

I take two painkillers to dull the throbbing pain in my arm before quickly picking up all the boxes and shoving them unceremoniously back into the cupboard. That's another mess I don't have the patience to explain.

I can hear someone coming, and I don't have the energy to stick around and talk, so I take off upstairs to what has unofficially become my room. It's once I close the door that my composure comes crashing down.

I didn't even see it coming. One minute I was fine – if slightly irritated, and the next I'm collapsed in a puddle of tears because _nothing will go right._ My wrist still hurts, so I take another pill. I sit down on the floor by the window and everything comes rushing back to me I feel like I've been transported back to the night this all began, watching the tiny people scurry around Mission Creek under the light haze of the rain. My head hurts now, thinking about how I've come so far only to find myself right back at the beginning. I take another pill.

Only now the pain is different. It's not fresh and sharp and new anymore. It's the same thing every single moment of every single day, and I'm bored of it. It feels like being submerged in ice water. The cold is so intense that it burns your skin, and it presses in on you until you can't breathe, but after a while you become numb. You're still hurting, but you can't feel it anymore. All you feel is tired, and weak, and cold. Freezing cold. All the time.

Then suddenly, you become hyper-aware, and it all comes rushing back to you. Sometimes, it hurts more the second time around. Memories have a funny way of doing that. All of a sudden I remember – _this is happening to me –_ and it's real. It's not like the tiny people I watch through the window, going about their lives completely unattached from mine. It's not even like the watered down shadow of pain that I've been suppressing for the past month. It's real, it's always there, and it _hurts._ I take another pill.

I settle in front of the window, but I can't muster the concentration to watch. Instead, I stare blankly and wonder why the pills aren't helping. I take two more. Somewhere downstairs, far away, someone is calling my name. I don't answer. I'm too tired. How long have I been here? My eyes are heavy, and I want to let them sink under the weight of the cold, cold water that's rising around me, but it's still light outside. I shouldn't be tired. I start to panic. How many of those pills did I take? I struggle to stay awake, to call out. _Help me,_ I beg. _Am I dying?_

I don't want to die. Do I?

* * *

"I found her, she's asleep."

"In the middle of the day?"

Someone takes the box of pills from my hand. "She's not sleeping."

Suddenly the whole room speeds up, spinning around and around until I start to feel dizzy. There are hands everywhere, all over me. Pulling back my hair, pressing into my neck, pulling me upright.

"Oh Bree, what have you done?"

" _What have you done, you stupid girl?"_

I don't want them touching me. Right now, I'm in between, floating above their rapidly spinning room. I'm paused, resting, while they rush around me in fast forward. I want to stay here forever. They're going to hurt me. Panic charges through me, someone screams and for a minute the hands are gone. I feel the same way I did when I fought 'Douglas' in training. When was that again? Within moments, though, the hands are back, and stronger than me once again.

"Adam, help me out here!"

" _Hold her still, Adam!"_

" _Adda, no!"_ The last voice sounds choked, terrified. I realise it's mine. I can't move. The hands – Adam's – are stronger than me and I know it's useless to fight it. I slump back and wait for it to be over. Someone else is stroking my hair, their hands small and gentle. Where am I? When am I?

Another pair of hands grabs my face – how many people are here? – and covers my nose and mouth with a damp towel. It smells horrible and I feel my insides start to turn inside out. What are they doing to me? As suddenly as it arrived, the towel is gone and I gasp for air. Everyone is still for a moment, an air of anticipation in the room. My stomach is churning, and I struggle to keep everything down, but something tells me to stop fighting. They've already won. So I let go, falling back when I'm done and letting the sobs flow free. The strong hands turn gentle, and the gentle hands melt away to soft whispers.

"Shh, Bree, you're okay now." Vaguely I wonder why I wasn't, but I feel my mind slipping away into sleep again.

"At least ten. She's lucky we found her."

"Why do you even have that?"

"Why did Adam eat my nanobots?" There's a pause and someone's grabbing my wrist. Feeling for a pulse, I realise. "She'll be fine."

That's the last thing I hear before sleep finally pulls me under.

* * *

 **A/N: This was hard to write. I did some research on how to write on such a heavy topic, so I hope it comes across as faithful to true life, but please let me know if there's any issue with it so I can fix it asap. I also purposely did not leave this chapter on a cliffhanger (in case it's not explicitly clear, Bree is definitely alive and physically well). If this chapter has brought up any problems with you, and you need to talk, please do not hesitate to private message me. I will always be willing to listen. Thank you for sticking with me and this story, and see you chapter!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: As promised, here's the explanation for the somewhat confusing events of last chapter. Also, Bree and Chase bonding (yay!) because that's so far been pretty lacking in this story. Mild trigger warning for mentions of suicide and abuse but nothing too serious.**

* * *

I awake on the couch in the living room, head pounding and throat dry. I remember being scared, and then darkness. What happened? Blinking against the harsh light, I pry open my eyes.

There's a glass of water sat on the coffee table in front of me. "Drink," I hear Chase say.

I do as I'm told, sitting up and carefully lifting the glass in my shaking hands. As the cool water slips down my throat, the remaining traces of uncertainty wash away and my sleep-fogged mind clears. The water tastes subtly of lemon. I hate lemon water.

"The vitamin C in lemons is good for you," Chase tells me. I still hate it.

Regardless, I drink the whole glass and set it back on the table. I wait for Chase to say something, but he just looks back at me expectantly. We sit at an uneasy stalemate for a long while, each waiting for the other to break the silence. I watch condensation drip down the now empty glass and pool on the table in a ring. Chase puts it on a coaster.

It's him that makes the first move, finally. "What happened?"

I'm thrown off guard a little by the gentleness of his tone. The weight of the tension between us felt hostile, angry, but maybe he's just as lost as I am.

"I was hoping you'd be able to explain that to me" I reply cautiously.

"You don't remember?"

"Not in great detail, no," I explain. "Just that I was really tired, and then there were people everywhere and everything was happening so fast, and then nothing."

Chase nods. "Too many pills can have that effect."

Pills? What does he mean? I frantically search through my memory, the events finally starting to become clearer to me. I took two pills, because I was injured, another for a headache, another when the pain still hadn't faded, and another, and another…

Oh.

"I'm so, so sorry."

"Why did you do it?"

"I didn't," I begin. Chase starts to interrupt, indignant, but I continue. "Not on purpose, anyway."

He looks perplexed.

"I fell, while I was training."

"We noticed." He gestures at my wrist, which is now wrapped in a fresh bandage. "You should have said something when it happened." I look away guiltily.

"It was really hurting, so I came up to get some ice, and I remembered that Mr Davenport left some painkillers in the kitchen. So I went looking for them. I found them, but I also managed to drop nearly everything from the cupboard onto the floor.

"It made me really angry, Chase. It was a tiny little thing and I couldn't even do that right. There was a huge mess and I was so stressed and it was making my head hurt. So I took the pills and I went upstairs and I just broke down. It came completely out of nowhere, but I just couldn't take it anymore. I needed a break.

"But it wouldn't stop. Everything kept on hurting and nothing was going right, and I panicked." I take a deep breath before continuing, futilely attempting to wipe away the tears streaming down my face. "So I took more pills, and then more. I just wanted the pain to go away, to give me a moment to catch up. I lost track of how many pills I took."

Chase doesn't say anything for a while. When I finally dare to meet his eyes, he looks shell-shocked. I struggle to read him. He's not angry, or hurt, or disappointed. His face remains blank, eyes unblinking.

"Please say something," I beg.

Finally he breaks out of his trance. "We had no idea you were struggling."

"Neither did I," I admit, a hint of bitterness seeping into my voice. "I'm a really good liar."

"Do you remember what happened when we found you?"

"Not really. Just that everything was happening so fast but time was moving so slowly. I wasn't really paying a lot of attention, I was just scared. I couldn't move."

"You were mentally comprised, so your bionics glitched. Mr Davenport said that might happen"

"Pardon?"

Chase sighs. "You weren't able to store memories of what happened because your emotion – fear – caused you to glitch and have a flashback. Your mind wasn't in the present" he explains.

"How did you–?"

"Mr Davenport freaked out," He tells me before I've even finished my question. "Who's Adda?"

I freeze. Did I say that out loud? I want to tell him, but I know that'll only give him more questions. He's better off not knowing the answer to what he'll inevitably ask.

"Bree," he warns. "You can't hide everything from us. It's not good for you."

"Where's Mr Davenport?" I divert.

"In the lab. I wanted to be the first to talk to you, and he agreed. The others can be sort of tactless. Who's Adda?"

Despite everything, I find myself letting out a quiet giggle. Chase looks at me like I've gone mad. Maybe I have.

"I'm sorry, it's just weird to hear you call him that."

"Who is he?"

I sigh. Chase obviously isn't going to let up, so I have no choice but to tell him. "Adam."

He looks perplexed.

"Well, not the Adam we know now. Adda is what I called him when I was still leaning to talk. You were Tay, not that you were very interesting to talk to, being a baby and all."

"Adam hurt you?" His tone is demanding, and I look at him only to see a steely impression set across his face

"No!" I insist. "He would never do that. To either of us. We're a team, remember? Always have been, always will."

"You sounded pretty distressed. Why _his_ name?"

I don't say anything for a while. What can I say? Finally, I meet his gaze. "Promise you won't tell anyone?"

"This seems like something Mr Davenport should know."

"He already knows."

There's a heavy pause before he finally tells me "I promise."

So I tell him. About the flashback I had, Douglas forcing Adam to hold me down while he hurt me. About how he tried so hard to pit us against each other, play our strengths against the other's weakness. About how he made us fight, hurt each other, help him do unthinkable things. But the most important thing, I told him, was how through it all we still stuck by each other. How every night we'd come together, to talk, to cry, to listen. How we'd pick each other up when we fell. And how sometimes, after a really bad day, we'd all squeeze into Adam's capsule and hold each other tight until we fell asleep.

Chase listens, and I watch him carefully in case he gets too upset and I need to stop, but his expression remains carefully neutral the entire time. When I finish, silence falls as he takes in what I've told him. I feel anxiety creeping back in. Was it a mistake, telling him so much?

Finally, he speaks. "We're still here for you, you know. If you'll let us be."

* * *

 **A/N: So this may be the end of the story. I know it's in no way completely resolved, but I'm not really feeling much of a response to this story and this chapter ties up some of the loose ends at least. If you do want this story continued (I also have ideas for a prequel and possible sequel), please let me know and I'll keep going, but otherwise it's going to end here. Thanks for reading and I'll see you all next time!**


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